Chapter 6: Counterpunch - Birkenfeld Fights Back

After discovering the three-page memo that basically proved UBS was setting up its own bankers as fall guys, Birkenfeld doesn’t run. He fights back. This chapter is where he stops being a loyal employee and starts playing chess.

The Morning After

Birkenfeld storms into his boss Christian Bovay’s office, slams the memo on his desk, and literally grabs the guy by the collar. Nose to nose. Fist cocked. He tells Bovay this memo exposes every banker on the Americas desk, every client, every shareholder. Bovay trembles and mumbles something about “standard office procedures.” Birkenfeld drops him and walks out.

The entire floor is dead silent. Everyone heard it. Birkenfeld straightens his tie and says good morning in French like nothing happened.

Gathering the Evidence

For the next few weeks, Birkenfeld plays it cool on the surface. Business as usual. Phone calls, jokes, cigarettes at the desk. But behind the scenes he is quietly collecting everything – training manuals on how to secretly recruit American clients, years of “bring in more money!” emails from management, client records showing massive hidden accounts.

He walks copies out of the bank every night. Studies them at home over whiskey and jazz. First rule of discovering a corporate crime: grab the evidence before anyone knows you have it.

Olenicoff Gets Raided

In May 2005, Birkenfeld calls his biggest client, billionaire Igor Olenicoff, from a pay phone. Standard practice for this kind of client. Olenicoff picks up and whispers: “The IRS is here in my office… with a SWAT team.”

Phone goes dead. The wolves have arrived.

Birkenfeld flashes back to a yacht trip with Olenicoff a year earlier in Central America. Over drinks off the coast of Belize, the Russian billionaire had basically predicted this. “I believe I am being looked at,” he said. “Men who make pennies as government employees are not enamored of men with yachts.” They had discussed moving his $200 million out of UBS, but never pulled the trigger. Now the trigger was being pulled on him – by guys with helmets and guns.

Olenicoff decides to move his money to an even more secretive bank in Liechtenstein. Birkenfeld sees the writing on the wall.

Nobody Answers the Phone

In June, Birkenfeld writes a formal memo to UBS Legal and Compliance heads, attaching the three-page document. Polite, professional, on the record. He asks them to explain it.

No reply. He sends it again in July. Silence. Again in August. Nothing. Six attempts total. They just ignore him completely.

So Birkenfeld goes nuclear. He shares the memo with private bankers at every UBS branch – Geneva, Zurich, Lugano. Spreads it like wildfire. Every manager who gets asked about it dances around with excuses and fake ignorance. Nobody changes anything. Business as usual. The bank wants its money, and if the soldiers get killed in action, so be it.

Resignation and the Exit Interview

In September, Birkenfeld consults two employment law firms. Both say the exact same thing: “Resign from this bank immediately.”

On October 5, 2005 – almost exactly four years after he started – Birkenfeld hands Bovay his resignation. Bovay plays shocked. Birkenfeld sneers and walks out.

The exit interview is classic. HR asks why he’s leaving. He says he’s been asking about the memo for three months with zero response. A guy named Juerg puffs up and says, “You are not going to get an answer.” Birkenfeld leans over the desk: “I will get an answer. I guarantee you.”

He slaps down his corporate cards and leaves. He already has everything he needs stashed away at home. The only things he takes from his desk: his favorite ashtray and a UBS coffee cup. He wants that corporate logo sitting above his fireplace “like the severed head of a dragon.”

Gardening Leave and One Last Fight

Swiss law gives you six months of paid leave after you resign. Birkenfeld makes the most of it – Saint-Tropez with his girlfriend, the Philippines with a buddy and a helicopter, Morocco with another friend. For the first time in 20 years, he is not hustling for clients.

Then February hits and his bonus is missing. UBS claims he forfeited it by resigning. Birkenfeld fires back with a detailed legal argument. Bovay responds with one line: “You’re not getting your bonus. Forget about it.”

Wrong thing to say to Bradley Birkenfeld. He calls an old contact, gets a recommendation for the meanest corporate attorney in Geneva – Dr. Charles Poncet. Shows him the contract, the bonus records, the revenue he generated. UBS owes him 600,000 Swiss francs.

One week later, Birkenfeld sues UBS for a million.

“I like round numbers,” he says.

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Part of the Lucifer’s Banker Uncensored series